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Gaining control of
your life after
having a baby
A Self Help Workbook for Post-natal Depression
Contents
Part 1 About this book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .4
Part 2 Understanding post-natal depression . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8
Part 3 Setting goals . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .15
Part 4 Self monitoring . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .18
Part 5 Changing the way you behave . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .25
Part 6 Changing the way you think . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .28
Watch out for your rule book . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .33
Part 7 More helpful techniques . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .38
Part 8 Bad days, setbacks and relapse . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .48
Part 9 Useful information . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .51
1 Anxiety . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .51
2 Relaxation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .55
3 Sleeping better . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .58
4 Medication . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .61
5 Supporting someone with post-natal depression . . . . . . . . . . .64
Part 10 Tips for managing post-natal depression . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .66
Part 11 Six months on . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .68
Part 12 Further reading and helpful agencies . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .70
Bibliography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .71
Contents 3
Meet Diane, Ros, Kayleigh and Jasmine
Part one Throughout the programme you will be helpful. Do not worry if you do not exactly
introduced to four characters, Diane, Ros, recognise yourself or your problems in the
Kayleigh and Jasmine who will help to bring cases described. Our four characters are
the techniques to life. You can follow their fictional but based on typical real life
progress during the programme if this is situations.
Hello, I am Diane, a I am Ros. When I was
person who you would not a student I had
expect to have depression. depression . I then
About this book The depression after the had postnatal
birth of my baby, Rory, depression after my
was made worse by my first child, Jamie, was
Background The book has been written by a Clinical own high standards. I born. After my second
Psychologist (Alison Sedgwick-Taylor), Sue think I’ve learnt that I’m child, Jenna, was
This workbook is different from other books Moos, (Maternal Mental Health Strategy Lead) a perfectionist and that born, I felt like a bad
you may have read. Gaining Control of your and two patients (Lauren Thomas who has 100% perfect is just not practical, especially mother and lost all energy and
Life is a practical guide and will tell you about suffered from anxiety and depression, and with a baby in the house. Learning to cope enthusiasm. I found this programme
a number of skills to manage your moods. The Linda Thompson who has suffered from with “it’ll do” and “good enough” has helpful in getting active again.
programme is designed to build your episodes of postnatal depression). Linda has been the key for me in making me Finally acknowledging there is a
knowledge and confidence step by step to provided invaluable comments and feedback, happier. problem, with a name and treatment
help you work steadily towards your goals. and is quoted throughout the book. The that might help, has been a real relief.
The techniques in this workbook come from techniques that are presented are ‘evidence- My name is Kayleigh. I
“cognitive behavioural therapy”. This is a type based’, that is, they have been extensively am a single mum with a
of therapy used by psychologists and others to researched and shown to be effective in the beautiful little boy called I’m Jasmine and I
help people manage all sorts of problems. The management of mental health difficulties. All Joshua. I have had a was struggling after
“cognitive” part deals with how you think, and the techniques, when used alone but pretty tough life so far, the birth of my
how this can affect your moods. The particularly when used together, have been and a traumatic birth. I daughter Naomi. My
“behaviour” part deals with how you can shown to be effective. have no confidence in mother-in-law has
manage your moods by changing what you do. myself as a mother and been really supportive
lie awake at night but I needed to learn
Who is it for? worrying and crying. The programme has to feel more confident
I had postnatal depression helped me become happier about myself about looking after
This book is for women who have mild to after each of my children and my life. I’ve a long way to go, but this my daughter on my own. The thought
moderate depression before or after having and received counselling has been a good start. of this made me anxious and panicky.
their baby, or if they are recovering from an after two episodes. I think The book teaches you how to take
episode of severe depression associated with this book is great – it small steps towards your goals – that
pregnancy. It could also be useful if you are clearly explains some useful makes it so much more manageable.
supporting someone with depression. techniques. No matter how
hopeless it feels now, they
do work, so give it a go.
Linda, patient adviser
4 Primary Mental Health Service/Gloucestershire Health & Social Care Community – Gaining control of your life Part 1 – About this book 5
are about the techniques you will need to suggested. If you do just one thing that is
learn and practise. Part 8 is about staying well. described in the book, at least you have taken
Additional information that may or may not be a step in the right direction.
Getting the most out of the relevant to you is provided in Part 9. Part 10 is
workbook a summary and Part 11 is a 6-month on review Summary
of the progress of our patients. You can also
You can choose whether you do the find out about additional reading and useful This self-help programme is for anyone
programme in full or just read some of it now agencies in the back of this book. struggling to manage their moods around the
and then. You can dip in and out of the book For this programme to work you need to put time of children. It could also be useful if you
if this is helpful to you. If you want to follow the suggestions into practice repeatedly. This are supporting someone with depression. The
the programme in full, the following structure takes time and considerable determination. workbook teaches cognitive and behavioural
is suggested: techniques that have been shown in research
Throughout the programme there will be and clinical practice to be very effective.
In our experience we recommend you take many opportunities for you to write down Reading the workbook will not be enough.
between 8–12 weeks to do the programme. your thoughts and feelings. The homework is You will need to practise and use the
However, if you want to take less or more time a very important part of the programme and techniques over time to feel the benefits.
to read and take in all the information that is will really help to make a difference. It is
fine. Obviously the amount of time you can important for you to find time to do this.
dedicate to the programme will be affected by Accept offers of help so that you have some
the demands of looking after a baby. If you free time, and try to set aside some time when
have someone who can help with looking the baby is asleep.
after the baby, and someone with whom you
can discuss your progress on a regular basis, You need to have decided that things need to
this will also be beneficial. This need not change for you to be regaining control of your
necessarily be the same person. life. You need to stick at it. Each little step can
Week 1 Parts 1 + 2 add up to a major change for the better.
Week 2 Part 3 By picking up this book you are saying that
you want things to change. Of course you
Week 3 Part 4 want to feel better. This workbook is packed
Weeks 4 and 5 Parts 5 + 6 full of suggestions on how to start feeling
better, but they do take a bit of effort to put
Weeks 6, 7 and 8 Part 6 onwards into practice. Do not worry if you cannot do
Weeks 9 and 12 Part 7 onwards all that is suggested, or even half of what is
We want you, to find the techniques that work
best for you so we suggest you read and try “You may be feeling worried
them all. If you prefer particular techniques, about this already. Perhaps
and they are working for you, then stick to you feel you can’t even
them. manage the baby, let alone
However, we advise you spend no less than a anything else. But the benefits
week practicing the techniques presented in could be a happier, more
each new section. capable mum, and a happier
baby and family. Now isn’t
Diary sheets are available at the back of the that worth trying for?”
book should you wish to use them. Linda, patient adviser
We suggest you read Parts 1–3 first. Parts 4–7
6 Primary Mental Health Service/Gloucestershire Health & Social Care Community – Gaining control of your life Part 1 – About this book 7
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